LOOK HERE!
This is Sparkle McTwinkleshine, Santa's Head of Security here in the North Pole. We have reason to believe, due to photographic evidence, that you have our comrade and brother in custody awaiting harm and torture! We are demanding to have one Bauble "Mental" Ornamental returned to us immediately, unharmed and without delay. We know that Mental is a special boy and can be a bit mischievous at times, but he has an obsessive compulsive disorder that causes him to "acquire" items wrapped in yellow bubble-wrap (hence why we tend to use green and red NON-bubble-wrap here in Santa's Workshop) and tinkle on them. It's disturbing to us all and we had him under medical observation. He got a day pass... things got awkward when he didn't show at the proper time...
ANYWAYS!
You may be asking yourselves why you should oblige such a request to a little elf like me? Well... we happen to have your "Randi" (boring names, the lot of you! Save for runfromabear) under lock-and-key in our containment area, awaiting the most foul of torture that he can think of. There is a very large gong in the rear of said area, piles upon likes of reindeer poopy (our smells like gingerbread... theirs smells like cabbage!) and we also happen to have a 1080p Blu-Ray of Vanilla Sky on infinite loop that we are just pickled-tink to allow "Randi" to view to his heart's delight!
If our little Mental is not returned to us, we are set to bong-the-gong (OOOHHHH!!! I love loud noises!) until his migraines make his cotton candy burst from his ears! We will also hold shovelfuls of the hideous reindeer poopy under his nose until all of his gummy worms pop out of his mouth and all he can taste is UNSWEETENED CHOCOLATE! All of that while Vanilla Sky loops on our giant 1,000,000 inch screen TV!
You have 24 hours. 24 HOURS!!!
~*~*SMcT~*~*
That's my blowing snowflake signature so you know that I am a big meanie!
This is Sparkle McTwinkleshine, Santa's Head of Security here in the North Pole. We have reason to believe, due to photographic evidence, that you have our comrade and brother in custody awaiting harm and torture! We are demanding to have one Bauble "Mental" Ornamental returned to us immediately, unharmed and without delay. We know that Mental is a special boy and can be a bit mischievous at times, but he has an obsessive compulsive disorder that causes him to "acquire" items wrapped in yellow bubble-wrap (hence why we tend to use green and red NON-bubble-wrap here in Santa's Workshop) and tinkle on them. It's disturbing to us all and we had him under medical observation. He got a day pass... things got awkward when he didn't show at the proper time...
ANYWAYS!
You may be asking yourselves why you should oblige such a request to a little elf like me? Well... we happen to have your "Randi" (boring names, the lot of you! Save for runfromabear) under lock-and-key in our containment area, awaiting the most foul of torture that he can think of. There is a very large gong in the rear of said area, piles upon likes of reindeer poopy (our smells like gingerbread... theirs smells like cabbage!) and we also happen to have a 1080p Blu-Ray of Vanilla Sky on infinite loop that we are just pickled-tink to allow "Randi" to view to his heart's delight!
If our little Mental is not returned to us, we are set to bong-the-gong (OOOHHHH!!! I love loud noises!) until his migraines make his cotton candy burst from his ears! We will also hold shovelfuls of the hideous reindeer poopy under his nose until all of his gummy worms pop out of his mouth and all he can taste is UNSWEETENED CHOCOLATE! All of that while Vanilla Sky loops on our giant 1,000,000 inch screen TV!
You have 24 hours. 24 HOURS!!!
~*~*SMcT~*~*
That's my blowing snowflake signature so you know that I am a big meanie!